I have realized two things this morning:
1. It is very disturbing to have a life size plaster model of your child lying on your dining room table.
2. I have a SERIOUSLY messed-up sense of humor. So much so, that this morning I sent two of my kids off to school a wee bit disturbed...
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Model Son wearing Real Son's favorite hat... |
My son, who is 10, loves to do projects for school--it is where he truly shines. He loves to come up with very elaborate ways to express his ideas and this creative thinking has caused us to explore all sorts of techniques that I probably wouldn't have thought to do with him: papier mache, carving styrofoam, soldering, cutting marshmallow Peeps (that's another story). Allowing creative freedom has its drawbacks, too. His model of the ocean floor cost about $50 to make even with coupons and discounts and some creative scrounging on mom's part. But, I want to encourage that creativity--it's great for him to craft something himself and make something he is proud of (and, who knows, he might become a model maker for George Lucas someday!).
Anyhoo, on to freaking out my kids...so I was worried when he came home the other day and said he said he had to create a 3D model of the human respiratory system.
He had ideas. He wanted to sculpt the entire torso. He wanted it full size. He wanted it to be Model Magic (YIKES! My wallet just has a heart attack!!). I tried to use my powers of persuasion to get him to make it smaller (read: cheaper), but he said "no." He realized that creating a full size human form and then "cutting it in half and scooping out the insides" was going to be wasteful. I finally suggested paster tape--the stuff they used to use to make casts for broken arms in the "olden days." I explained the process and he was intrigued. I was worried.
We did some research on the how-to's and while he watched the Super Bowl last night, I layered the strips on him (I wanted him to do ALL the work originally and use a sibling as a model, but my little ones weren't into it and it was probably for the best--1st son says it was cold and freaky being in the plaster. However he did layer on the 2nd layer of strips and do all the art direction (which is hard to do when your face is covered in plaster strips).
But, I have to tell you, I was completely unprepared for the feelings I felt seeing my child in a full body cast...as I layered the strips up his torso and onto his head and face I felt so sad. We were laughing and giggling, but inside I was conflicted. So strange. The strange feelings were even more pronounced when we removed the cast. I cannot begin to describe the weirdness of seeing a life-size model of your child lying on the floor, or, as it is now, lying on the dining room table. Very strange.
It wasn't until this morning, when my son and I were discussing the weirdness of it all, that I revealed my creepy side. I told him that I should have taken his iPod and snapped pictures of the model doing all sorts of things around the house: watching TV, wearing my son's mohawk winter hat, driving the car--I just couldn't stop myself--I rattled off a list of things that Model Son and I would do while Real Son was at school. I realized the creepiness when Real Son looked at me with one eyebrow raised...he was laughing, but in that "if-I-humor-her-maybe-she'll-stop" kind of way.
I later related the story to son #2 and he also was a little wary. Especially when I told him I thought it would be funny to paint the model with glow in the dark paint and hang it upside down in his closet to scare to bejeebies out of him at night. Seriously, that would be AWESOME!!
So, when I get the calls from the school counselors today I will know why, but I think I'll let my husband talk with them. I think I might make the situation even worse!
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Model Son, do you want to watch Downton Abbey? Hmmm? I'll take your silence for a "yes." |